Saturday, June 29, 2013

What is Normal?

So, I would like to let you all know that I appreciate all who view my blog & send me email letting me know how much you appreciate my efforts. I think every one of you are special unique individuals! whether you be the curious first time reader or the reader of everything I write (sorry i don't update often enough) I think you are all the best.

One thing that I find odd. There seems to be...elitist crossdressers out there. CDs who think they're better than other CDs for some reason. For example the Very passing adult type of crossdressers putting down the lolita (aka young style) crossdressers. I know adult GGs who like to dress in lolita style, no one talks bad about them...ok maybe some (non anime fans) do but for anime fans its a non issue. Or the Make-up CDs vs the No Make-up CDs. Does it matter that some wanna Put on make-up and really girl themselves up and they are still as straight a man as a non dressing man or another man who dresses in women's clothing and doesn't wear make-up?

I understand that what is our own 'normal' may be abnormal to someone else but, can't we acknowledge each others differences without putting each other down? I know its hard. Most of us grow up thinking what happened in our family growing up is what happened in other families. They watched the same tv shows & listened to the same, or similar music. Then we, lets say, go to college. Meet people our own age from different parts of the country or world and talk about our family lives and realize that our 'normal' is not everyone's normal. You may find out that your 'normal' was a bit rougher than other people's normal. Maybe your friends would have loved to have had your normal while you hated your 'normal'. We meet every day with people whose life choices we wouldn't have made yet do we constantly put them down for it? For example. You make friends with someone at work. You normally only see them during working hours and never have lunch at the same time. One day you have lunch together and find out your new friend is Vegan and you are a proud Omnivore who is nearly a total carnivore! Do you put your friend down just because they don't eat meat (or vice versa)? Will you constantly tell them they are wrong because their choice of food is different from your own? You both still eat vegetables (you both still wear clothing meant for the opposite gender). You both enjoy each others company outside the lunchroom. Why is it so difficult to deal with them not eating the same exact foods (clothing style) as you? It shouldn't make a difference. It doesn't make you a bad person because you eat meat. It doesn't make you a bad person because you don't eat meat.

So, yeah. The crossdressing community is quite varied. A Rainbow of shades of grey. Lets try not to put each other down. Don't put down the Adult Babies. Don't put down the Lolitas/ the ones who like to wear young kids styles of clothing. Don't put down those who wear make-up. Don't put down those who wear no make-up. Don't put down the dudes in dresses who sport a full beard. Don't put down the ones who just like to wear womens underwear under their clothes. How bout just embracing people's differences whether you would dress as they would or not.

Thats all I have to say for now.

I love you all,

Pirate Pebbs!

P.S. I now host a night of Karaoke in Philadelphia.
Click the link to find out more. I'd love to see you there

Monday, June 24, 2013

Another Sorry post :/

Sorry I haven't posted in a couple weeks. I've been busy busy busy. Every year at the end of the school year I have a party for my Daughter & her friends & family. This year was the 4th incarnation of the party. A lot of my time went into cleaning the house and gathering supplies. Besides that I've been working, Mom-ing & doing my karaoke thing ( I now host my own night of Karaoke on Monday nights still under the Dr Thunder Karaoke name, which i'm totally cool with. I don't need to make a big name for myself & I didn't start into karaoke to make a big name for myself. I just wanna help people in a way that I can. Hopefully I will be self sustaining soon. Hoping to get a new job so I can pay bills...which are kinda piling up. I thought about doing a Paypal donation button here to help me...i don't know if I'm gonna do it though. I know I help others when I can...i don't know how many random others will help me. I know a few will/have helped me. I totally appreciate the help I get. I think I need help to get things out of my head and written down...and now i'm rambling. Ok. I have another interview lined up to post but i feel i need to talk to the interviewee a bit before I post. Hopefully I can do that on Wednesday. I'm working all day today (including hosting karaoke till 2am) then I have work again tomorrow and co-hosting karaoke tomorrow night (if i don't fall asleep before I get there).

I love you All & I'm sorry (yet again) for neglecting my duties to post.

Yours Truly,

Pirate Pebbs!

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Interview with a Straight Crossdresser # 2 ~Gia

I recently reached out to everyone who 'like' the Straight Crossdressers & Friends Facebook page to see if anyone there was willing to be interviewed for the blog. A few people volunteered to. This is the first of the finished interviews. 

This interview is with Gia, a beautiful 32 year old crossdresser from NY.

*PP: I'm glad you agreed to be interviewed for my blog, its been awhile since I've done one. I wanna try to make it a regular feature.
(*PP= Pirate Pebbs aka yours truly)

Gia: aww, you're welcome. I'm glad there are blogs like this and appreciate you doing this.

PP: Thank you!

PP: Do you find it odd that a Genetic girl, like myself, is so passionate about wanting to straighten people out?

Gia: Interesting word selection. "straighten"

PP: lol, I'm punny sometimes.

Gia: I don't think it's odd, but I do think it is rare.  It is difficult enough finding genetic women who are attracted to people like myself who perhaps are more "open" about expressing their feminine side.  To find someone who outwardly supports it to the point of building your own blog and reader base is something else altogether. So rare indeed.

PP: I never really thought of it that way...
I see myself as more of a person who doesn't like to see people put down for how they feel
I want people to be Happy and if people have to hide part of themselves because others will think they are odd or something so they keep everything pent up inside...they'll never really be happy.* (*This doesn't apply to people who become happy by abusing others or indulging in highly illegal activities People who have abusive impulses should seek help by a trained professional to help them overcome their abusive thoughts & impulses.)

Gia: Hehe. That's a good philosophy. All I can say is keep it up and perhaps you might encourage others with similar ideals.

PP: I'll do my best.

Gia: I've made sacrifices for being able to express who I am. Some are fairly significant. I think Dan Savage said something along the lines of, "the most powerful thing anyone within the LGBTQ community can do for change is to come out."

PP: Indeed! Now I'll [finally] get on to the questions. 
First, What name shall I call you? Gia or is there more to the name that you'd like noted?

Gia: It's just Gia. The name is somewhat influenced by the movie and the model. And there is a closeness to my actual name, which I'll leave to everyone's imagination.

PP: Ah, I know of that Gia, cool!
About when did you become interested in or start crossdressing?

Gia: When I was just a little cross dresser. I used to sneak into my sister's closet when no one was home and play dress up in front of the mirror. Course I was a bit limited at that point, but the fascination grew.

PP: Is she older than you?

Gia: Yes, she's older. Which was good news for me since the clothes was a better fit. I wonder if I would have tried on her clothes if she was a little sister. That feels different for some reason.

PP: Have you ever been 'caught' [as a kid]? If so, by who?

Gia: Haha. Once, I think I unconsciously sabotaged myself. 
I was getting more daring and I was again rummaging through my sister's closet. This time it was in our weekend home, and there was this flowery dress that I used to love to wear. Well, it turned out that they were getting rid of it. I snuck the dress into my own closet and left it there.
Of course my mom found it, and gave me this completely embarrassing guilt trip about how boys shouldn't be wearing dresses.
That was the first and last time I was ever caught by my family. To this day, they don't have a clue.

PP: That was my next question, if your family knows you did, but I know that answer now.

Gia: Well, there was a minor incident when I still had a trace of eyeliner and my sister saw it, but I made up some story about being dragged out to a goth night by some girl friends. [so to answer the question] No, and I think I'm going to leave it that way. I'm sure my dad wouldn't really care. Well not really. But my mom, lovely woman, is a bit more old fashioned and would never get it.

PP: Have you /do you ever gone out crossdressed in public?

Gia: Yes, all of the time!

PP: When did you start going out [cross] dressed?

Gia: It took some getting used to. But I started to get dressed up on my own and going out after I finished college and moved out to my own apartment.

PP: Do you get someone to do your makeup? Did anyone teach you how to apply makeup?   Did you learn trial & error style?

Gia: Of course back [then], I relied on more help to get ready and didn't really know how to work it without looking like a cheap hooker with bad make-up. But I eventually developed my own style and with some coaching from my lovely make-up artist friends, I developed the basics for painting. I've had a long list of teachers.  Thank god for Craigslist and Myspace.

PP: Are you 'Passing' /is it your goal to be passing?

Gia: It's important to me that... I don't look like a guy in a bad wig.
Yes, passing is my goal, but I'm realistic. I'm a tall guy. Big shoulders, and there is only so much you can do. So, I do what I can to get as close as I can. But I have no expectation that people aren't going to know I'm a boy in a dress. At least after a 2nd or 3rd look.

PP: From the photos I've seen you look great! Passing or not!

Gia: Aww, why thank you.
I'm a cross dresser, but I like to refer to myself sometimes as a female illusionist. It's about creating a perception / image of being a woman. But I don't necessarily feel like a woman, or want to be one. It's also a bit like creating an alter ego where I can act a certain way that I wouldn't otherwise.

PP: Indeed!
Do you Tuck &[/or] Shave when you crossdress?

Gia: Tucking is a general term. I wear briefs and 2 pairs of tights, and usually that's enough. I don't usually pick out outfits where it would be too tight in the wrong spots.
As for shaving, I do to varying degrees. Of course I shave my face. I usually shave my chest too, but the legs I usually hold off on unless there is a really good reason.
And I leave my arms and hands alone. Those are just too tough to explain. It's all about the long gloves. 

PP: I hear ya!
What makes you want to crossdress? How does it make you feel?

Gia: Haha. Good question. I think it's changed/evolved over the years.
I didn't know what to make of it at first. Yes, like a lot of cross dressers, it's a bit of a turn on, and I think that's primarily how it started. It was exciting to see how sexy I can get. I'd look at myself in the mirror and get turned on by what I saw, and I wanted to do more. It was the primary driver to buying new clothes and shoes and make up.

PP: Does [being] Gia make you feel more empowered? Less shy? Anything like that?

Gia: Well, yes. And that goes to the other reasons for my dressing. 
It evolved to the point where it wasn't about turning myself on. I've reached the point where I realized that it was more of a release. A chance to escape from the same old and be someone else for awhile. While at the same point be able to more freely express my inner feminine side - which is much easier to get to when you're in a dress.
Needless to say, there were some ups and downs along the way.

PP: [Unfortunately], life is full of those.

Gia: I've heard other stories about people essentially taking these deep introspective looks at themselves and basically trying to numb the need or desire to cross dress.
Twice in my evolution, I've tossed out full wardrobes in street corner trash cans, far away from my apartment. Out of disgust.
"This is not who I am. I'm a boy, I like girls, I'm confused, stop doing this to yourself."
But it always comes back. And it's really about accepting it to whatever level that you're comfortable. Whether that's wearing the occasional panty in bed, or in my case, full ensemble head-to-toe going out to bars and dancing. Or the occasional photo shoot.

PP: Ideally what percentage of your time would you prefer to be 'dressed'? like half the time, every once in awhile, every weekend etc?

Gia: It depends. Usually I'd go out 3-4 times per month in drag. It depends if there is a reason, and I don't typically dress up to just hang out in my apartment alone. That's boring. If I'm going to spend 2 - 2 1/2 hours getting ready - I want to be seen darn it!

PP: I hear ya!
Have you ever been caught by a girlfriend? If not, have you admitted to crossdressing to a girlfriend? What was the result?

Gia: No, never caught. And with my last significant relationship I was pretty upfront about it right away. It wasn't easy. But important. And we got through it, at least at the beginning.
I wish I could say that it was a positive in our relationship, but it wasn't. And although I don't think it was the only reason for why we eventually broke up, it was a big factor.

PP: I still think being honest up front is the best way to start a relationship
thats what I generally tell to all my CD friends & on my blog.

Gia: Exactly. So now, I've been very focused on trying to date girls who know about Gia right up front so there are no surprises down the line. Gia even has her own [dating website] profile.

PP: Is there an inspiration for your look?

Gia: I can't point to anything specific. But I like to be edgy. Bit more rock and roll versus country. Nothing against country. But my roots are in punk and maybe a little glam. It's funny to put names to it, but it's like a weird combo of David Bowie, Lady Gaga, Angelina Jolie and Sid Vicious.

PP: Cool!
Do you have a story or idea to share that you haven't previously shared here?

Gia: I want to express that if it wasn't for Gia, I would not have met some of the most interesting and special people in my life. She's opened up new experiences that I would never have had before, and frankly, makes life more interesting to live.
It's not easy being a straight cross dresser. But usually it's worth it.

PP: I feel like i've met a lot of cool interesting people through my blogging etc as well. I'm glad I was encouraged to start it.

Thank you for letting me interview you for my blog today. Would you like for me to put a link to your online profile or email, in case some lovely ladies are interested in getting to get to know you better? 

Gia: Yep, anyone should feel free to reach me at But I can't guarantee I'll be able to reply to everyone.

That was  Interview with a Straight Crossdresser #2. If you have any questions or comments feel free to comment below or you could email me or Gia. You can reach me at , or at the Facebook page I hope you all enjoyed learning a bit more about some of the wonderful people who inhabit our world who I happen to hold dear.