Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Wizard World Philly 2012

Ok, so over the past week through now I have been working on my Wizard World stuff. I have a table with friends. I plan on doing face painting, selling jewelry that my kid and I made and I'll be giving out cards or flyers for this page, karaoke and...i've getting costumes together. Very Busy. I'll get a better blog post out next week.

One thing though. A bi CD I met on one of the sites i'm on told me they're getting married. So my Congrats Goes out to the happy couple. This is the second CD i've met online over the past year who had found love and is getting (or got) married! I LOVE happy endings! Wedding is scheduled in a few months. They want me to be the photographer, which i think is very cool, hopefully i can be there and photograph the event. If not, well, i'll at least go there and enjoy the celebration!

Below is a copy of the flyer i'll be handing out at Wizard World... and by handing out I mean they'll be sitting on my table while I paint faces and probably every dude I see dressed like a chick will probably get one. Will be double sided. Side 1 in color!

Friday, May 18, 2012

CDs Dates and Dating Websites

So I got a message from a CD who mentioned that he lets girls know that he CDs before he meets them offline and that because of that there usually is no first date. While I feel it is important to let the person you want to date know in advance so there is not a misunderstanding down the road...it may not be the best idea to let them know before you meet in person. Below is some advice I gave him.

*Small piece of advice.* You don't have to say anything about CD-ing before the first date. I mean, you at least wanna see if there is any mutual attraction offline, right? I mean if you don't like her offline, what's the use of telling her, eh? She may have friends on here [*here being OkCupid] and 'warn them' about you [*i know i've warned one or two of my friends about creepers]. Maybe after the 2nd or 3rd date let her know. So she sees your personality and knows that it's 'worth it' to know both sides of you. Some girls are more willing to accept, or at least try it out if they realize they really like you. Otherwise...well...they may just think you're a pervy freak. I'm just telling you this cause, I realllllllly want you to succeed in finding a GF. I...am not the typical straight female... Unfortunatly not all girl know they're in to dudes who are...so in touch with their feminine side. I hope more of them will read my blog and give guys like you a chance. I've been spreading the news as best I can but...I can only reach but so many within my contacts. Another suggestion. If you do what I say above and you do like them enough to let them know about the other side of you, send them a link to my site. Maybe the one about the advantages of dating a CD. It might help.

On dating sites that are not targeted towards crossdressers... most crossdressers are incognito. They generally don't out themselves (i say generally because i have seen a few on the sites that are fine with posting their CD pics and talking about their CD nature on there) Besides, most CDs that I know are closeted anyway. The choices for hot chicks are better on those sites as well. From what I hear, GGs on the crossdresser dating sites are sparse & among the few on there, very few that are 'Hot'. (the getting must be pretty low if i'm considered among the hot! lol, I kid) Besides, i'm sure most girls, even if they are in to cross dressers have no idea about the crossdresser dating sites. Even if they did, most are paid sites masquerading as free sites.  (you have to cleverly hide your contact info and hope that the reader figures out how to contact you...you know...and stop sending you messages that you can't read. They should just give me a free full membership!!! *ahem*) 

There are many girls that Love drag queens with shows like RuPaul's Drag Race & Drag U. I think many of them see the contestants/professors on those shows and might be receptive to a CD if properly presented. I just did a search for RuPaul on a dating site and found that a lot of straight females watch the show...might be a good icebreaker to feel out if they may be receptive...or curious. I only found crossdresser dating sites about a year ago. I think I will link the sites I am on here and if anyone here finds me feel free to find my messenger info on there and drop me a line and say Hi!

These sites are apparently owned by the same company and if you signed up with one, you can sign into both...weird.


These 2 sites I think are associated with each other... not 100% sure, but you can actually message people on the site below...i think they have to have a paid membership for you to chat with them.


There is always Meetup.com. The Philadelphia group I am in is below. It's not really a dating site, but some people kinda use it that way. :)

I think that is all the info and advise i have to offer for the moment. I may add to it as i see fit.

Until next time....(i really need to think up an ending catch phrase, lol)


Wednesday, May 9, 2012

How to 'PASS', Guaranteed!!!

Lisa Empanada
The following post is not My Original content, but is used with permission of, and from the perspective of, Lisa Empanada. She is a transgender woman living in Philadelphia, PA. I saw her post on a Meet-Up group that we are both members of. When I read it I had to ask her if I could re-post it here for all of you who are having trouble with Passing. Again this is from Lisa's Perspective which is a perspective that I will never truly know being that I'm a Genetic Girl and don't have to deal with such problems.  Enjoy!
Who here wants to pass? Yeah, yeah... you heard me right. I am going to GUARANTEE that you will pass. Just bare with me as we try to figure out what passing really means.

Ok, lets get started... Who here has a masculine build? *Lisa's hand goes up.*

Who here is too tall? *Lisa's hand goes up again.*

Who here has a not so feminine voice?
 *Lisa's hand goes up. Thankful that her hand is speaking for her.*

Who here has big hands, man hands? *Lisa starts to raise her hand, but self consciously leaves it in her lap and in her baritone voice yells out..."HEY! No fair Lisa you are picking on me!"*

So is it true that Lisa can't 'pass' in public? (after that question I am betting my dance card becomes less full) In fact a lot of us girls who say we are passable probably would find many who disagree. Would I write 'passable' in my profile? No, I would say that I am sexy (a state of mind, a projection) I can be beautiful (again a state of mind, a projection) And I would say I am definitely feminine (which is certainly a state of mind and projection)

Sexy, Beautiful, Feminine all traits commonly applied to woman but not traits that all woman apply. So by now you can see where I am going with this. The question is why do you feel you don't pass in public. Do you see yourself as a man in a dress or are you fearful that this is how others will see you? Are you preoccupied with worrying if you have been 'read'? Chances are these are causing you not to pass.

When someone feels that they do not pass its because they feel like they look out of place, unnatural to their surroundings. Looking exactly like a woman is something you can't control, either you have it, or like me, you don't. But you do have control over looking out of place and appearing unnatural. Its all in the projection.

First off mannerisms. We can all, with practice, walk, sit, move, smile, flirt, gesture and in general act exactly like genetic woman. If you come plodding into a club, like some Neanderthal in heels way too high, as if you are trying to carry an invisible watermelon between your thighs, chances are you'll look unnatural, not only to your surroundings but to who you are. There is a flow and a grace to woman. A grace that can only be accomplished through practice and attitude. You must act and think like who you are is what you should be. Others will hear with their eyes what you are trying to say about yourself.
Feeling and acting natural is all that really matters. So right now half the readers are screaming... Rip Off! We want our money back! No Fair! ....Alright now, calm down missy, and cross those legs by the way. I am serious here.

If you want to look out of place then all you have to do is to act in a way that supports that visual. If you subconsciously look down and away and your body language projects insecurity and doubt, most people will look at you and not think Why is that man in a dress?.... but more accurately... Why is that person so uncomfortable in their own skin? Its less likely that they will wonder why you are there, but more likely they will wonder why you didn't keep your insecure flat @$$ home.

When a woman walks into the room she should do so with confidence (not to be mistaken for being flamboyant). If how you look and how you act seems the most natural thing to you and you smile and enjoy the fact that you are where you belong, most people will see that energy and respect your comfort. They certainly won't feel sorry for you. They rightfully will conclude that any prejudices that they may chose to inflict upon you will be a total waste of their time.

Simply put passing in public is acting and feeling natural in your surroundings. Dress as most people around you are dressed, Act according to your environment. If you believe you belong where you are, then so will others. Refine your femininity and project the inside outside you'll live it and they'll get it, trust me.
So passing is all about projecting who you are...with confidence. Am I a genetic woman? NO! I am a Transwoman and I pass as such. We all should be proud of who we are.

"But Lisa, I'm a just a crossdresser and I love club wear and exotic wear, I'll never pass...right?"

No! WRONG! You are not 'JUST' anything. You are 'ALSO' which makes you 'more than', which should be looked at as a huge plus. And besides that you will pass as a person who celebrates his/her freedom. You will pass as someone who is not beholden to the expectations of others. You WILL pass as a spirited individual if you are not afraid to let your spirit shine.

There it is ...that is how we PASS. We proudly present ourselves for who we are and that will get us a passing grade every time. Ooh one more thing, if you are peeing standing up that's not passing and that's not peeing, That's pissing and only guys take a piss. You get a big fat incomplete in this course and have to start over. Girls 'pee' or 'tinkle' and always remember you are a girl, sit while you pee but if you 'wipe' yourself afterward give yourself extra girlie points for taking passing to extremes...lol.

Good Luck and get out there Girls!

Sunday, May 6, 2012

The advantages of dating a crossdresser

Not every girl is going to be in to crossdressers. Hopefully that will change once they realize the advantages of crossdressers over 'regular' dudes. For example, with a CD your clothing size, you've doubled your wardrobe cause you can share clothes :D. You will have a partner who actually Likes to go clothing shopping with you and will not lie to you about what looks good on you, just to rush you out of the store, he'll want it to look good so he can wear it as well. He'll understand the need (and expense) to get hair and nails done...the list goes on. If other females understood the advantages there may be more willing to date cd's. They may not be 'in to' it, but...acceptance is a good start cause...well...just like anything else, not everyone will be in to what you're in to, but they just might be 'ok' with you doing it. Like how some dudes like watching sports games and some women aren't in to it but let their men have their sunday football. There are women who weren't in to sports who have grown to like or even love the sport that was introduced to them by their man. The same is possible with your cd. Never know till you try.